As we go thru life having hundreds of thoughts a day, some positive and others negative. These thoughts help us move forward or stop us completely.
What I am learning is that I have a choice, either I can let my thoughts dictate my emotions or not. Today for example, I was thinking of putting the winter clothes away and taking out my summer things. I started thinking how my husband would help me transfer the clothes from the attic and I could not do it alone. All of a sudden I received a burst of energy and started transferring the clothes. Within an hour I was completely done.
If I would have listened to my thoughts I would have looked for someone to help me and felt sorry for myself. Instead started the project and the next thing knew I was done.
What have you been putting off doing because your thoughts have been telling you to get help or give up the idea? Following are some steps you can take to get started:
1. Schedule time to begin the project. Putting aside time to work on a project provides support so you get started.
2. Tell someone what your plans are. Letting them know what you are planning helps with motivation and keep your word.
3. Reward yourself when the project is completed. You can remind yourself while you are working that when finished you will receive a special gift. This motivates you to complete the project.
4. Acknowledge yourself for a job well done. Acknowledging yourself enforces our greatness.
What project are you planning to complete today? Taking some or all of the above steps will help you complete the project. Let me know how you make out.
Tuesday, April 15, 2008
Wednesday, April 9, 2008
One Step At A Time
My daughter, Mindi, sent me the story below and I would like to share it with you.
The Daffodil Principle
Several times my daughter had telephoned to say, "Mother, you must come to see the daffodils before they are over."
I wanted to go, but it was a two-hour drive from Laguna to Lake Arrowhead "I will come next Tuesday", I promised a little reluctantly on her third call.
Next Tuesday dawned cold and rainy. Still, I had promised, and reluctantly I drove there. When I finally walked into Carolyn's house I was welcomed by the joyful sounds of happy children. I delightedly hugged and greeted my grandchildren.
"Forget the daffodils, Carolyn! The road is invisible in these clouds and fog, and there is nothing in the world except you and these children that I want to see badly enough to drive another inch!"
My daughter smiled calmly and said, "We drive in this all the time, Mother."
"Well, you won't get me back on the road until it clears, and then I'm heading for home!" I assured her.
"But first we're going to see the daffodils. It's just a few blocks," Carolyn said. "I'll drive. I'm used to this."
"Carolyn," I said sternly, "Please turn around."
"It's all right, Mother, I promise. You will never forgive yourself if you miss this experience."
After about twenty minutes, we turned onto a small gravel road and I saw a small church. On the far side of the church, I saw a hand lettered sign with an arrow that read, " Daffodil Garden ." We got out of the car, each took a child's hand, and I followed Carolyn down the path. Then, as we turned a corner, I looked up and gasped. Before me lay the most glorious sight.
It looked as though someone had taken a great vat of gold and poured it over the mountain and its surrounding slopes. The flowers were planted in majestic, swirling patterns, great ribbons and swaths of deep orange, creamy white, lemon yellow, salmon pink, and saffron and butter yellow. Each different colored variety was planted in large groups so that it swirled and flowed like its own river with its own unique hue. There were five acres of flowers.
Who did this?" I asked Carolyn. "Just one woman," Carolyn answered. "She lives on the property. That's her home." Carolyn pointed to a well-kept A-frame house, small and modestly sitting in the midst of all that glory. We walked up to the house.
On the patio, we saw a poster. "Answers to the Questions I Know You Are Asking", was the headline. The first answer was a simple one. "50,000 bulbs," it read. The second answer was, "One at a time, by one woman. Two hands, two feet, and one brain." The third answer was, "Began in 1958."
For me, that moment was a life-changing experience. I thought of this woman whom I had never met, who, more than forty years before, had begun, one bulb at a time, to bring her vision of beauty and joy to an obscure mountaintop. Planting one bulb at a time, year after year, this unknown woman had forever changed the world in which she lived. One day at a time, she had created something of extraordinary magnificence, beauty, and inspiration. The principle her daffodil garden taught is one of the greatest principles of celebration.
That is, learning to move toward our goals and desires one step at a time--often just one baby-step at time--and learning to love the doing, learning to use the accumulation of time. When we multiply tiny pieces of time with small increments of daily effort, we too will find we can accomplish magnificent things. We can change the world.
"It makes me sad in a way," I admitted to Carolyn. "What might I have accomplished if I had thought of a wonderful goal thirty-five or forty years ago and had worked away at it 'one bulb at a time' through all those years? Just think what I might have been able to achieve!"
My daughter summed up the message of the day in her usual direct way. "Start tomorrow," she said.
She was right. It's so pointless to think of the lost hours of yesterdays. The way to make learning a lesson of celebration instead of a cause for regret is to only ask, "How can I put this to use today?"
Use the Daffodil Principle. Stop waiting.....
Until your car or home is paid off
Until you get a new car or home
Until your kids leave the house
Until you go back to school
Until you finish school
Until you clean the house
Until you organize the garage
Until you clean off your desk
Until you lose 10 lbs.
Until you gain 10 lbs.
Until you get married
Until you get a divorce
Until you have kids
Until the kids go to school
Until you retire
Until summer
Until spring
Until winter
Until fall
Until you die...
There is no better time than right now to be happy.
Happiness is a journey, not a destination.
So work like you don't need money.
Love like you've never been hurt, and,
Dance like no one's watching.
Wishing you a beautiful, daffodil day!
Don't be afraid that your life will end, be afraid that it will never begin.
If you want to brighten someone's day, pass this on.
The Daffodil Principle
Several times my daughter had telephoned to say, "Mother, you must come to see the daffodils before they are over."
I wanted to go, but it was a two-hour drive from Laguna to Lake Arrowhead "I will come next Tuesday", I promised a little reluctantly on her third call.
Next Tuesday dawned cold and rainy. Still, I had promised, and reluctantly I drove there. When I finally walked into Carolyn's house I was welcomed by the joyful sounds of happy children. I delightedly hugged and greeted my grandchildren.
"Forget the daffodils, Carolyn! The road is invisible in these clouds and fog, and there is nothing in the world except you and these children that I want to see badly enough to drive another inch!"
My daughter smiled calmly and said, "We drive in this all the time, Mother."
"Well, you won't get me back on the road until it clears, and then I'm heading for home!" I assured her.
"But first we're going to see the daffodils. It's just a few blocks," Carolyn said. "I'll drive. I'm used to this."
"Carolyn," I said sternly, "Please turn around."
"It's all right, Mother, I promise. You will never forgive yourself if you miss this experience."
After about twenty minutes, we turned onto a small gravel road and I saw a small church. On the far side of the church, I saw a hand lettered sign with an arrow that read, " Daffodil Garden ." We got out of the car, each took a child's hand, and I followed Carolyn down the path. Then, as we turned a corner, I looked up and gasped. Before me lay the most glorious sight.
It looked as though someone had taken a great vat of gold and poured it over the mountain and its surrounding slopes. The flowers were planted in majestic, swirling patterns, great ribbons and swaths of deep orange, creamy white, lemon yellow, salmon pink, and saffron and butter yellow. Each different colored variety was planted in large groups so that it swirled and flowed like its own river with its own unique hue. There were five acres of flowers.
Who did this?" I asked Carolyn. "Just one woman," Carolyn answered. "She lives on the property. That's her home." Carolyn pointed to a well-kept A-frame house, small and modestly sitting in the midst of all that glory. We walked up to the house.
On the patio, we saw a poster. "Answers to the Questions I Know You Are Asking", was the headline. The first answer was a simple one. "50,000 bulbs," it read. The second answer was, "One at a time, by one woman. Two hands, two feet, and one brain." The third answer was, "Began in 1958."
For me, that moment was a life-changing experience. I thought of this woman whom I had never met, who, more than forty years before, had begun, one bulb at a time, to bring her vision of beauty and joy to an obscure mountaintop. Planting one bulb at a time, year after year, this unknown woman had forever changed the world in which she lived. One day at a time, she had created something of extraordinary magnificence, beauty, and inspiration. The principle her daffodil garden taught is one of the greatest principles of celebration.
That is, learning to move toward our goals and desires one step at a time--often just one baby-step at time--and learning to love the doing, learning to use the accumulation of time. When we multiply tiny pieces of time with small increments of daily effort, we too will find we can accomplish magnificent things. We can change the world.
"It makes me sad in a way," I admitted to Carolyn. "What might I have accomplished if I had thought of a wonderful goal thirty-five or forty years ago and had worked away at it 'one bulb at a time' through all those years? Just think what I might have been able to achieve!"
My daughter summed up the message of the day in her usual direct way. "Start tomorrow," she said.
She was right. It's so pointless to think of the lost hours of yesterdays. The way to make learning a lesson of celebration instead of a cause for regret is to only ask, "How can I put this to use today?"
Use the Daffodil Principle. Stop waiting.....
Until your car or home is paid off
Until you get a new car or home
Until your kids leave the house
Until you go back to school
Until you finish school
Until you clean the house
Until you organize the garage
Until you clean off your desk
Until you lose 10 lbs.
Until you gain 10 lbs.
Until you get married
Until you get a divorce
Until you have kids
Until the kids go to school
Until you retire
Until summer
Until spring
Until winter
Until fall
Until you die...
There is no better time than right now to be happy.
Happiness is a journey, not a destination.
So work like you don't need money.
Love like you've never been hurt, and,
Dance like no one's watching.
Wishing you a beautiful, daffodil day!
Don't be afraid that your life will end, be afraid that it will never begin.
If you want to brighten someone's day, pass this on.
Wednesday, April 2, 2008
Losing Weight
EMPHASIZE WHAT WORKS
Dieters lose weight when focusing on
what motivates them.
The Spring weather has finally arrived and your thoughts are turning to losing weight. You better lose those 10, 20 or 30 pounds before you can’t hide behind your winter clothes. Then your thoughts turn to summer and how will you be able to put a bathing suit on again. Join the club!
What are you going to do? I am sorry to say you can’t just wish the weight off, it takes a commitment, changing your thinking and behaviors. On the other hand, you can make the weight lose process easy and fun. No, I have not lost my mind!
Susan gained 15 pounds from September through March. She was besides herself with worry about losing the weight. Every morning she would decide to go on another diet. Her plan was to skip breakfast, eat a salad with no dressing for lunch and a regular dinner. This plan worked in the past. Does this sound familiar?
Susan left the house with a cup of coffee and when she arrived at the office everyone was enjoying the bagels their manager brought in for her birthday. She told herself, “I didn’t eat breakfast so I can have a half of a bagel.” Susan took a whole bagel and while talking to her friend she ate the whole thing. When she realized what happened she decided to start her diet tomorrow and then enjoyed a chocolate donut. This is a common occurrence among dieters.
What to do to change your behaviors and lose the weight once and for all. You can create a personal balance sheet to see what motivates you. It works the same way as an accounting balance sheet it compares assets and liabilities.
Start by drawing a line down the center of the page. On the left side put the heading “Motivators” and on the right “Negative Thoughts.” Record your answers on your personal balance sheet. See an example below the questions.
On the “Motivator” side answer the following questions:
1. What motivates me to stay on a healthy eating plan?
2. How do I feel when I eat healthy and in moderation?
3. What support do I need to continue following my healthy plan?
On the “Negative Thoughts” side answer the following questions:
1. What excuses do I use to start eating unhealthy?
2. How do I feel when I blow another diet?
MOTIVATORS
Watching the scale go down.
I am taking care of me. I am too tired to cook tonight?
I feel proud of myself . I feel like a failure.
A partner helps me stay on a diet.
NEGATIVE THOUGHTS
Everyone is eating why can't I?
I am too tired to cook tonight?
I feel like a failure.
I can’t lose weight so why try.
Review both lists and decide what steps you want to take so the motivators start working for you. On the other hand, what tools are you going to use when those negative thoughts pop their ugly head.
Some of the steps you can take are as follows:
1. Plan your healthy realistic menu the day before. By planning a menu that does not deprive you from eating the foods your body needs, will help you follow your plan.
2. Remind yourself constantly that you are taking care of yourself. When you realize you are doing something to ensure you look good and stay healthy gives you the courage and strength to continue.
3. Say to yourself before you put any food in your mouth, “The food will not make things better, only hurt me.” Telling yourself the food will only hurt you, makes you stop for a moment and think before taking the next bite.
4, Share with a partner accomplishments and find solutions to challenges. Working with a partner you are not alone and accountable to another person. It also helps you find solutions to challenges.
5. Acknowledge yourself each day for realizing you are IMPORTANT. When we realize only we can take care of us, somehow it makes it easier.
Now it is your turn to try the exercise above and see what miracles it creates. Please share your experiences and other ideas with the Love Yourself – It Matters! Community.
Dieters lose weight when focusing on
what motivates them.
The Spring weather has finally arrived and your thoughts are turning to losing weight. You better lose those 10, 20 or 30 pounds before you can’t hide behind your winter clothes. Then your thoughts turn to summer and how will you be able to put a bathing suit on again. Join the club!
What are you going to do? I am sorry to say you can’t just wish the weight off, it takes a commitment, changing your thinking and behaviors. On the other hand, you can make the weight lose process easy and fun. No, I have not lost my mind!
Susan gained 15 pounds from September through March. She was besides herself with worry about losing the weight. Every morning she would decide to go on another diet. Her plan was to skip breakfast, eat a salad with no dressing for lunch and a regular dinner. This plan worked in the past. Does this sound familiar?
Susan left the house with a cup of coffee and when she arrived at the office everyone was enjoying the bagels their manager brought in for her birthday. She told herself, “I didn’t eat breakfast so I can have a half of a bagel.” Susan took a whole bagel and while talking to her friend she ate the whole thing. When she realized what happened she decided to start her diet tomorrow and then enjoyed a chocolate donut. This is a common occurrence among dieters.
What to do to change your behaviors and lose the weight once and for all. You can create a personal balance sheet to see what motivates you. It works the same way as an accounting balance sheet it compares assets and liabilities.
Start by drawing a line down the center of the page. On the left side put the heading “Motivators” and on the right “Negative Thoughts.” Record your answers on your personal balance sheet. See an example below the questions.
On the “Motivator” side answer the following questions:
1. What motivates me to stay on a healthy eating plan?
2. How do I feel when I eat healthy and in moderation?
3. What support do I need to continue following my healthy plan?
On the “Negative Thoughts” side answer the following questions:
1. What excuses do I use to start eating unhealthy?
2. How do I feel when I blow another diet?
MOTIVATORS
Watching the scale go down.
I am taking care of me. I am too tired to cook tonight?
I feel proud of myself . I feel like a failure.
A partner helps me stay on a diet.
NEGATIVE THOUGHTS
Everyone is eating why can't I?
I am too tired to cook tonight?
I feel like a failure.
I can’t lose weight so why try.
Review both lists and decide what steps you want to take so the motivators start working for you. On the other hand, what tools are you going to use when those negative thoughts pop their ugly head.
Some of the steps you can take are as follows:
1. Plan your healthy realistic menu the day before. By planning a menu that does not deprive you from eating the foods your body needs, will help you follow your plan.
2. Remind yourself constantly that you are taking care of yourself. When you realize you are doing something to ensure you look good and stay healthy gives you the courage and strength to continue.
3. Say to yourself before you put any food in your mouth, “The food will not make things better, only hurt me.” Telling yourself the food will only hurt you, makes you stop for a moment and think before taking the next bite.
4, Share with a partner accomplishments and find solutions to challenges. Working with a partner you are not alone and accountable to another person. It also helps you find solutions to challenges.
5. Acknowledge yourself each day for realizing you are IMPORTANT. When we realize only we can take care of us, somehow it makes it easier.
Now it is your turn to try the exercise above and see what miracles it creates. Please share your experiences and other ideas with the Love Yourself – It Matters! Community.
Tuesday, April 1, 2008
Sharing Our Special Gifts
What do you like about yourself? Most of us don’t think about what we like or dislike about ourselves unless something happens and we are upset about our behavior. Usually we spend most of our time thinking about the things we have to do, losing weight, or about other people. When do you ever stop and think about the great person you are?
I was leading a workshop and requested that all the participants find a partner they knew and tell each other what they liked about them. At first the room was very quite and then as time went on, and with my prodding, people started to share and I saw smiles and tears. If the group members are strangers I still have the participants find a partner and tell each other what they like about themselves. It still has the same effect. The exercise continued until each person had three new partners.
After the exercise a person shared that he never realized how much others valued his advice. Another person shared how everyone loved her smile and people felt comfortable being with her. The shares continued and what we all learned from the exercise is how we always take for granted our special gifts.
Today is a new day and your chance to acknowledge your special gifts. I invite you to complete the following exercise to discover your special gifts.
1. Ask someone you feel very comfortable with if they would help with a special project you are doing. If they say, “Yes.”
2. Explain you are going to tell them what you like about them and then they can tell you what they like about you.
3. Continue this exercise two more times.
4. Give each other a big hug if you are together.
5. Write yourself a letter listing what you like about yourself and what your friend told you.
6. Mail the letter to yourself.
7. Read the letter often reminding yourself what special gifts you give to others and what a beautiful person you are.
Please let me know after completing this exercise what you have discovered about your special gifts. Also, what impact has it made in your life after learning about them. I can be reached by emailing helen@loveyourself.net.
We are beautiful people who have many special gifts to share with ourselves and others.
I was leading a workshop and requested that all the participants find a partner they knew and tell each other what they liked about them. At first the room was very quite and then as time went on, and with my prodding, people started to share and I saw smiles and tears. If the group members are strangers I still have the participants find a partner and tell each other what they like about themselves. It still has the same effect. The exercise continued until each person had three new partners.
After the exercise a person shared that he never realized how much others valued his advice. Another person shared how everyone loved her smile and people felt comfortable being with her. The shares continued and what we all learned from the exercise is how we always take for granted our special gifts.
Today is a new day and your chance to acknowledge your special gifts. I invite you to complete the following exercise to discover your special gifts.
1. Ask someone you feel very comfortable with if they would help with a special project you are doing. If they say, “Yes.”
2. Explain you are going to tell them what you like about them and then they can tell you what they like about you.
3. Continue this exercise two more times.
4. Give each other a big hug if you are together.
5. Write yourself a letter listing what you like about yourself and what your friend told you.
6. Mail the letter to yourself.
7. Read the letter often reminding yourself what special gifts you give to others and what a beautiful person you are.
Please let me know after completing this exercise what you have discovered about your special gifts. Also, what impact has it made in your life after learning about them. I can be reached by emailing helen@loveyourself.net.
We are beautiful people who have many special gifts to share with ourselves and others.
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